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12 Killer Mistakes Men Make When Trying To Pick Up Women
You go out, you try your best, even you thought it was going well but still, you go home alone. If this sort of thing happens to you, you’re probably doing something wrong. Read the mistakes below so you know where to focus next time.
1. Believing that attractive women are unapproachable
This is one of the most common misconceptions about women. There are 2 sides to this story: one tells us that very attractive women are mean and heartless and you can never get them (you always see some guy holding their hand…); And another story tells us that attractive women are lonely women alive. The truth is, they are just like any other woman but less insecure (conscious about their hotness). How do we deal with this? Stop thinking so much and go for it, the more you think about it, the higher your anxiety level will be which will increase your chances of failure. If done right, you will find that these women are very approachable and the only way to see that is to try it.
2. To compliment a (attractive) woman on her physical appearance
Don’t compliment an attractive woman on her emotional appearance. They’ve heard it too much, they just want a guy who’s different, a guy who can’t tell them how hot they are and how beautiful their eyes are and all that mean depressing talk.
Only compliment women on their looks when you notice that they are very insecure. To be honest, most women are insecure about anything, but when it comes to looks, they know it if they look good. Quite frankly, if they’re too insecure, you shouldn’t even be talking to them.
3. Staring at women for long periods of time
Staring at women for long periods of time is never a good thing. First of all, you’re creepy, I mean, think about it for a second “That guy has been staring at me all night… he’s starting to annoy me” they might say to their friends. Do you want to be that guy? No! Then stop looking.
Also the more you stare, the more insecure you become. I’m a true believer in the 3 second rule, you don’t have to live your life by it but it’s a great rule. Think back to the last night you were out, you liked that girl and started looking at her, you instantly wanted to make a move but then, something held you back, then you started thinking, well what should I say? What if he says no? What if he ignores me? What if his friends laugh?… And then he leaves. This is just one reason why you should always have a standard opener ready so you never have to think about what to say. When in doubt, just say “HI”.
4. Being afraid to approach a woman if there are men in the group
I think all men; I find this one hard to work with. Approaching a woman in a group with guys is never easy. The first thing that comes to mind – is she someone’s girlfriend? If he is, you’re just fooling yourself, but scan the group for a second, see if there’s any indication, if not, take action. As hard as it sounds, when women see this random guy approaching them even though these 3 lame guys are sitting here doing nothing…who do you think will catch her attention? If you are an entertainer (good with people) you can even engage guys in conversation, ask them where they are from, you can even make fun of them just a little. These guys won’t know what hit them and he will be very impressed.
5. Waiting for him to make the first move
Sadly, it is quite popular among our people. We all know that we should take action but still, we think that if we sit there in the corner, ignoring everyone, he will suddenly come up to us and strike up a conversation. Don’t get me wrong…it has happened but what are its chances? Maybe 1 in 1000?
Think about when you wanted to get the job. Are you sitting at home waiting for someone from somewhere to hear about you and suddenly offer you a job? Probably not, because if you do that, you don’t have a job… you applied as much as you could until you got the job. Exactly the same life principles apply to women.
6. Falling “in love” before even communicating
This is a stupid mistake often made by many beginners. They see a woman and before they approach her they start thinking…”OMG she’s so beautiful, she’s my dream woman, I want to have her baby, if I get this girl I’ll marry her tomorrow” What do you think? do? First of all it will make it impossible for you to approach her because you don’t want to mess up this lifetime of happiness that is about to happen. Second, you talk to her completely excited, swoon over her, look into her eyes and become completely turned on. Finally, when you get rejected, you cry yourself to sleep because he was the one.
Stop making these mistakes, you’re only hurting yourself!
7. Using the same lame opener
I’m not going to go into too much detail with this one; It’s basically what the title says. Stop using the same lame opener over and over because it worked once or you really liked it. I was addicted to “So, what’s your story?” But mostly it scares girls. Just saying “hi” has proven far more effective countless times, so when in doubt, just say “hi”.
8. Showing frustration
Girls feel it when men are desperate. We’ve all been there, after months of no work, you really want to get something going. You go out, you try it with every girl, you get more and more frustrated because it keeps happening, only to get nothing. Women hate disappointment, they go for guys who look like they don’t care, that’s why guys with girlfriends find it easy, because they don’t care if they win or lose.
Women also go for guys who have a lot of female attention, considering you are reading this article, you may not have much female attention but you definitely have some girl-friends. Next time you go out, ask them to come with you, talk to them all, make them smile, draw attention to yourself and see if it improves your chances.
If you’re feeling desperate and you don’t want to show it, the best thing to do is to take a break from them. Do not go outside for 2 or more weeks. It may seem like a long time because you’ve been drained for a while, but clearing your mind and getting away from the game will relax you and make you forget the frustration.
9. Don’t show your true intentions
Let’s be honest here, what do we want from women? Most of us want sex, and women know it. If you go out, start talking to him, and talk and talk some more and where is it going? She’ll start wondering what this guy really wants and then BAM you’re either in the friend zone or not getting any action.
Women love honesty and maybe even more than honesty they love feelings. If you communicate your feelings and desires (being open about how you want to rip her clothes off) she will respect you for it and know from the start that you are interested in her. Trust me, it will bring results just make sure you don’t say stupid things like “baby you’re so hot I want you here right now”, be more subtle but let your intentions shine through.
10. Caring too much
Caring shouldn’t be in your vocabulary, sure you can take care of your loving wife when you have one but now, you’re just trying to get this hottie into bed. Why would you care if you end up talking to him all night only to discover that it’s going nowhere? You will only disappoint yourself. Don’t do it! Instead, dust yourself off, go home and come back tomorrow because the next, all-night conversation will lead to something better.
11. Fear of rejection
You should never fear rejection. Rejection is something that happens all the time, don’t believe people who say you’ll never get rejected, no, you will but, it’s just part of the game. The more you try, the more rejections you deal with, the better your game will be resulting in fewer and fewer rejections.
When I first started I was rejected by 80% of the girls I approached (it might have depended on my looks), but did I care? no The moment you stop caring about rejection, the moment you stop fearing rejection, and your success with women will change when it happens.
12. Believing he is different
Depending on your game some women will always try to act like they know you, they know what you’re about. When this happens some people think “OMG this girl is really different, she’s really smart, she totally got me”. It’s not true, it’s him trying to tell you that he knows the game and whatever else but in reality, he’s susceptible to the same attraction triggers as 99% of other women.
If you’ve learned all the right tricks and all the right lines, go with them, don’t trust him. Don’t think he’s different and “I need to be myself because the game won’t work on him”. Focus your mind and remember that the game will work on it.
So next time you go out make sure you remember all these “mistakes” and don’t fool yourself! Your game can only get better if you play it more.
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