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The Three Universal Fears and How They Affect Our Lives

In his book, The Divine Matrix author Greg Braden writes, “The root of our ‘negative’ experiences can be reduced to one of three universal fears (or a combination of them): abandonment, low self-worth, or a lack of faith.”

At first glance many may want to argue against Greg Braden’s teachings. “But it’s not my fault that all these horrible things happened to me” they will say. How can anyone begin to claim that I am somehow responsible?

As an example I will offer you a fragment of a story I am currently living with which I believe clearly demonstrates the truth of the Universal Fears theory. I hope that those who read the following will relate, and it is my intention that this story will be used to help others in similar situations.

There’s a preteen girl in our neighborhood who, over the past few years, has been, well, getting worse. She’s been my daughter’s friend since she was 5 and even then she wasn’t always the cutest of little girls.

he doesn’t faith The friendships he develops are strong and constantly sought after. As soon as she begins to realize and drama and heartache ensues. When I look at all this from the perspective of universal fear, I can clearly see that this is one Lack of faith Which is at the root of most of his suffering.

My daughter Emma has been on the receiving end of her friend’s pain many times and for a while she really suffers. I could see how her friend’s actions and words alienated my daughters self confidence. He begins to judge his worth based on approval from his troubled friend.

At age 11 I discovered that my daughter was still quite “flexible”. He has not yet made up his mind how he fits into the world. As such, and armed with my knowledge of high importance self respect And learning, in the words of Wayne Dyer “Be independent of the good opinion of others“My daughter and I are making this experience a true gift.

Emma puts notes around her room reminding her how wonderful she is. When his phone turned on he first saw the words “Hello Awesome”. He started writing a book about his experience. And when her friend starts another round of pain she is now in a place where she can constantly remind herself “I have nothing to do with this”.

Emma’s sense of self worth As he grows, he becomes increasingly able to process his friend’s actions without making them his own. We both discovered that the more balanced and distant he was from his friend’s attacks, the less attacks occurred.

Only time will tell if they will disappear completely. It is my hope that Emma continues to become more centered and independent from her friend’s outbursts – able to develop a sense of trust in her friend relationship – which by definition will improve her ability to enjoy life.

With this story in mind, take a few minutes right now and sit with the “negative” experiences that are currently happening in your life. Can you see that it is not so much what is happening to you, but your reaction to it, that is causing the suffering? Can you see that your reactions come from one of these three universal fears?

Recognizing and attending to this truth is a key step in transforming it. Just keep watching your reactions to life – and when you’re ready, start renaming them.

Letting your phone read “hello awesome” every time is a great first step 🙂

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