A One-And-A-Half-Story House Is Commonly Known As A Calling Cthulhu, a Silly Horror Story

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Calling Cthulhu, a Silly Horror Story

“Whoa, man! Cool colors!”

“Yeah, well, I had to prepare the temple.”

“How did your folks react when you painted your room like this?”

“Dad was puzzled. Mom was happy, of course, that the walls and the ceiling were not black anymore. She thinks I’m in love and ocean green is my love color. Or that my girlfriend has green eyes or that she loves green. Something like that.”

“But you don’t have a girlfriend.”

“Yes, Tom, I know, but mom doesn’t. She just thinks whatever she wants to think.”

“Moms. I bet she keeps asking to meet her. To invite her for dinner or something,” Harry laughed.

“Yup. Have you brought the candles?”

“Sure. Seven of them, our lucky number. Searched half the town to find the right color.”

“The search will more than pay off if we succeed. Give them here.”

“Umm, you sure this will work? I mean, we don’t know any real spells,” Tom asked, hesitantly.

“Of course I’m not sure. But I talked to this witch girl, you know, the Wiccan? Asked her if she knew any spells that might work. She told me she wasn’t really interested in summoning and stuff like that, but I should invent my own spells, anyway. That’s the way it works, you have to find out what works best for you.”

“Tom, he already explained it to us. Even if she was interested and knew some great spells that worked just fine for her, they might not work at all for us. As if we were trying to wear her clothes.”

“Yuck! I’d rather die!”

Harry smiled to himself as he observed the three of them dressed in green robes. The bath oil with the scent of ocean, which he had stolen from his sister, made the room smell real nice. He sure hoped this worked out, it would be really funny to rule the world.

“All right, everything is ready. Have you guys memorized the words?”

“Sure.”

“Yeah. You sure your folks won’t be coming soon?”

“Of course I’m sure. They won’t be home until morning. Don’t worry, no one will interrupt us. Oh, and guys, please remember, we are learning by trial and error. If this doesn’t work, we’ll try to find out something that does. We read more… “

“Oh, no.”

“Shut up, Tom. We research more. Until we succeed. If it was really easy to summon Cthulhu, everyone would be doing it, right? We are only sixteen, none of us will die tomorrow of old age, so we have plenty of time. Whatever happens, we don’t give up. Okay?”

“Sure.”

“Yeah, we ain’t no sissies to give up.”

“All right, lets begin then. Harry, give the sign.”

Harry waved his hand, and the boys began chanting.

“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.”

“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.”

“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.”

“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.”

Their voices kept raising until it hurt them, but the boys never stopped, only chanted faster and faster.

Something moved. The flames flickered. The boys paused for a moment, exchanged significant looks, and kept chanting.

“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.”

“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.”

The flames died, but not the light in the room. There was no obvious source of the light. The walls seems to emanate some sickly green light, but that wasn’t possible, was it? The summoners exchanged puzzled looks and kept chanting.

“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.”

Something began to appear in the middle of the room. Something huge. The room was big, but no room built by human hand could be big enough for that.

Still chanting, the boys stood up and moved towards the window. Harry opened it, eyes still on the thing that was materializing in his friend’s room. Good thing that the room was on the ground level, not on the fiftieth floor.

Tom got out first, then the others. The chanting no longer seemed necessary. The boys looked in awe as the creature materialized, crushing the walls and finally the house. The creature as big as a mountain. The flabby claws. At the top, an awful squid-head with writhing feelers. With trembling voice, the first boy spoke:

“We have summoned thee, oh mighty Cthulhu.”

It seemed impossible that the thing could hear such a weak voice, but somehow, it did. Or it looked down at them for some other reason; the boys would never know. It bent down and reached for them, carefully picking them up with one clawed hand.

“We made it,” the first boy whispered. “We are his masters now.”

“Then we can command him to put us down, right?” Tom whispered back.

“Relax, he probably just wants to hear us better,” Harry replied, though he wasn’t sure of it. God, it was so huge!

Cthulhu swallowed them in one gulp and went into the night.

This story is featured at Art-Anima, a website promoting Science Fiction, Horror and all genres of Fantasy Literature.

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